^the way a person with a mental illness thinks is not on the same tracks as most of your mind is on.
For me, my train (of thought) gets stuck on the same line, over and over again. That line is crashing and everything around is burning. The only way to get back on the right one, I have to push a non literal button repeatedly until it’s all back online. In addition, I also suffered from a near life long depression of mind and spirit, tracing as far back as my first babysitter(I’ll share, but not yet).
Reading all that, you can see it transitions as I go. The OCD has been a blessing and a curse. The Depression is going to be my first focal point of my Biochemical research to find a cure. The depression is what caused me to “live my life” in a subdued state of consciousness. I was 100%functional, my father would argue to no end, but it becomes semantics. The only problem was, I would never really face all of my challenges. I droned on, accepting less and less actual responsibility for anything.
All the streams in my life came to a head on Feb 15th, 2017. I had a fully internal breakdown of “who I was”. I had grown to resent every step I had made for well over a decade. I had been on 2 different, doctor prescribed biomedical treatments. Those subdued my will to fight what I resented. I just “took one for the team”.
It has become my life goal to find a biochemical solution(cure) for a myriad of mental illnesses.