Today, as I try to keep on task, I struggle with going back to older bad habits. I then panic that I will revert, or worse, just no wake up. That feeling then fires through my system over and over again until I find some type of calming trigger. This is why I don’t want OCD anymore. I feel like being happy = the end of days. Depression sucks. OCD is a blessing and a curse. Eidict memory is another double edged problem>< All in coordination can really scramble your thoughts and make you doubt everything all at once, for nor real reason. Feeling almost stalled, like I should feel bad for taking a day off, since I have been doing so little, for so long. More later, when it’s all clearer.
I finally got myself to start a full body fitness healing program. It’s https://ddpyoga.com/ The man that goes by the name Diamond Dallas Page has been the single greatest Celebrity inspiration(2nd only to my Parents in the full list). His electrifying charisma and never quit attitude made him the greatest WCW Peoples Champion of all time. His story is one that is nothing shy of Legendary. He was in his “middle age” when he chose to become a professional wrestler(VERY taxing on the body). You see, DDP didn’t try. He set out with the purpose to do it and he did it. He also developed “DDP Yoga”. Don’t let the name steer you wrong. His style is a combination of Yoga; for balance and harmony of the body, Rehabilitation; for the purpose of preparing your body for success, and Calisthenics; to shape and tone the body, once it’s ready to rock. His ability to reach out to each person in great. His works prove themselves, look up his program. You won’t be sorry.
Today went similar to past Sunday’s. Which put me ill at ease. I don’t want to feel I’m turning away from my goals by taking a day off. Tomorrow morning is my tour of the University of Northern Iowa. I am looking forward to hearing what they have to say:) The path ahead is long and I feel like I have wasted SO much time.
http://www.alchemylab.com/what_is_alchemy.htm This made a lot of sense, after everything I have learned recently. Now I’m devoted as ever.
Nous sommes dans le même bateau