One of the really great and wonderful things that has occurred lately is that while working through my depression, OCD, and midlife crisis have opened my eyes to things I had overlooked. Like showing my wife more appreciation and admitting to when I am wrong. There is more to it, but that’s private.
I have been searching WordPress for other people that suffer from OCD. So many similarities between us, but one constant. There is no cure yet. Being “cursed” with a mental disorder is alarming to most of us. Those that discover it later in life are able to make past instances more understandable as far as mental well being is concerned. Some anxiety and depression are lifted, since an open understanding of the constant flow of internalized negative thoughts is reasoned to be the disorder and not some believed deserved punishment from past or present transgressions. I am also finding that some cases of OCD manifests itself in the form of constantly repeating an action or activity for minutes/hours/years. I am seeing some of these cases are “triggered” by a significantly distressful ordeal that in effect overloads the mind and causes a constant flow of repeated messages in order to bypass the mental trauma.
In my case it started in part very early as a block to the abuse that was done to me by a babysitter. Followed by being bullied and tormented in school and beyond for no good reason. The greatest blow was being betrayed by my daughter’s mother, but the disorder was already present and doing it’s damage by them. Only through deep introspection have I been able to put all the pieces together, with a lot of prayer and reliance on friends and family to bear with me while this was all going on.
This leads me to my latest decision to be made. Do I continue on my path to study Philosophy, as a means to understand the various past ideas of healing the body through unusual means or pursuing phycology to assist with the direct intervention of fellow troubled souls.
Thanks for stopping by. Peace to you and yours.