Note to us

Just a reminder to all of us out here with OCD, Depression, and other disorders of the mind.  You are not alone.  “We are legion for we are many”-Legion from the movie Ghost Rider.  You are not a monster for the thoughts that plague you.  Seeds planted don’t HAVE to be cultivated.  Meaning those dark and ugly thoughts never have to manifest.  Once you realize the things we beat ourselves up for are controllable, to a point, we can start working on finding out how to get rid of it!  Our group needs a cool name…like the Disorderlies.  Just kidding.  We know who we are.  Have a great day.  Until next time, peace to you and yours.


More about the struggle

If you do not take responsibility for consciously becoming aware of your shadow traits, you will find them projected onto others (of the same sex) in your environment. You may feel an irrational instinctive hatred for virtual strangers-The Modern Alchemist: A Guide to Personal Transformation
©1994 by Richard and Iona Miller

This is a great bit taken from the material I’ve been reading.  I understand this as, once you realize you are dealing with your own depression and the shadow side of yourself.  Your real and true dark side.  The dark thoughts that haunt you. The unethical and immoral actions you have taken that disturb you at your core.  We then project that on to others, that we may externalize our fears and regrets.  What I am studying now is how to reconcile my dark and light sides.  Finding the balance.  Depolarizing myself.  Working to break the paradigms I have created throughout life.  I called it decompartmentalizing  each chapter of life based on age, location, job, and current music habits.  I spoke some time ago about linking music to memories.  I did this to guard myself. So I could just stop listening to types of music in order to forget.

I believe that we could, as a whole species, embrace the thought process in order to move past the current state of discontent we feel towards one another.  Look within ourselves to see why we have issues with things like race, sex, gender, religion, or income status.  Like I have said before, if a person’s individual actions don’t directly effect you or those you protect, then it should not concern you.   The pigment in skin does nothing to you.  Their chromosome pattern does not affect you.  The side of their internal polarity towards masculine or feminine does not cause you ill.  And so and so forth.

As I work towards the healing of myself, I enjoy sharing.  Secretly I hope that someone reading this is positively motivated by it.  Like so many of my fellow blogger’s work has come to me when I needed it.  Thanks for reading today.  Peace to you and yours.

Timing is everything

I just got done reading a fellow Blogger’s article

Sharing this because it really hits home and I think others could use the great idea.  When you are dealing with a disorder, physical or mental, there are often feelings of shame and regret buried deeply within us.

I feel like all the years I spent closing myself off from nearly everyone due to depression and then the anti-anxiety/anti-depressants I was on triggering my Obsessive Compulsive Disorder caused an internal shut down.  I no longer wanted to hang out with anyone.  Only my closest friend, Jeff, and my family got any social interactions.  I still regret all of the missed time, but like BeautyBeyondBones expresses, it’s ok for me to take time to feel those lost feelings.

I really enjoy the synchronicity that occurs around the blog universe.  As if each person is somehow connected beyond the typed words.

This 4th of July is a going to go a little differently for our family.  My teenage son will be spending it with his girlfriend.  The rest of us will be with my folks, lighting some fireworks off, as per the norm.  I don’t speak of my family much here, but they are the core of my life.  Enjoy your holiday if you choose to celebrate it!  For those of you elsewhere in the world, take a moment out of your day to give us a wave and we’ll do the same.  Peace to you and yours.

When you blog

When you blog, do you think in terms of public speaking?  Picture yourself talking directly to your audience?  I do.  Sitting with people just chatting, perhaps sitting with an only friend sharing details and ideas I would normally keep to myself.  Sometimes I picture an audience, when I talk about cooking.  At times I have no specific image, just a sensation of a person.  But it’s almost always to someone.  Like a conversation, one sided, but happening none the less.

Some of the writing I read on WordPress are directly from the heart and soul.  I like those the most.  I enjoy Instragram and Snapchat, it’s nice to see people and their interests.  They say a picture is worth 1000 words.  So many  blogs I read are worth  millions.  It’s a safe(ish) place to share what we normally might not.

So lately I have been trying to “live in the moment”.  Neither obsessing over the past nor the future.  It’s far more challenging to me than I thought it would be, but it’s working.  I don’t get quite as spun up.